Who are you?

The world says you're a loser.  You tell yourself all the time that you're a failure.  Your girlfriend tells you you're selfish.  Your dad tells you you'll never make anything in life.  Your boss tells you you're not doing a good enough job.  The world says that there is no hope for you.  Satan tells you that you will never get over your past.  But God has a much different view of you. 

As believers and followers of Christ, one of the first things we should realize is that what God thinks of us is much different than the way we typically view ourselves or how the world views us.  We have to start seeing ourselves the way God sees us.  We have to be the people that the Bible tells us we are.  John 1:12-13 offers, "Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— ¹³ children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God." 
The Bible tells us that we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.  (Philippians 4:13) The Bible says that there is hope when it seems that all hope is lost.  (Romans 5:2) The Bible says that we have been forgiven, made clean, and justified by the blood of Jesus. (Romans 3:24)  The Bible says that God has a plan for us to prosper. (Jeremiah 29:11)  The Bible says that the Spirit of God is within us.  (1 Corinthians 3:16) The Bible says that the kingdom of God is here and in our midst. (Luke 17:21) 
When are we going to stop thinking about all of the negative things in our life and take on the mind of Christ?  When are we going to stop fearing our giants and start facing them?  1 Samuel 17:47 says that "the battle is the Lord's."  Today it is time to let him do the fighting for us. 

Commitment

In most civilizations, marriage is considered a sacred institution that involves the union of two parties, under God, who vow to commit themselves to one another for life.  Americans have become accustomed to ceremonies that involve the exchanging of rings, the recitation of vows, and a litany of other ceremonial offerings, such as the reading of scripture and the lighting of candles.  Invitees may also enjoy some of the great classical masterpieces, such as Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring and Canon in D.  The American church has done much to increase the grandeur of the wedding ceremony, as evident in the requisite planning and preparing for every minute detail, from the guest list to wedding cake and thank-you cards.

What is sorely missed throughout all of the hoopla is the genuine commitment of two people to become one in flesh—the sacred unification of two souls.  The American wedding has become much more about pomp and circumstance than it is about God.  We have failed to underscore the commitment and accountability that this decision necessitates, and therefore we discover our divorce rates at jaw-dropping frequency. 

It’s about time that we began to concentrate on the true value of marriage as a sacred institution.  It’s high time we put God first in our wedding ceremonies, making him the centerpiece of our marriages and lives together.  The wedding ceremony should be viewed as the beginning of two people’s lives together, walking hand in hand daily in the direction of Christ’s love.   Because we have failed to view marriage in this high of a regard, we often find ourselves to be lukewarm in our commitment to our spouses.  We lack passion and commitment and thus our lives together become a drudgery instead of a place of rest. 

This realization can be paralleled to our Christian walk, which begs the question, “Why do we continue to be lukewarm Christians?”  Why do we continually find ourselves slipping back into the same old routines that were characteristic of our former life before we came to know the truth of Christ?  It is because we do not love God to the extent that we are willing to submit to a level of commitment that equals that of marriage.  It is because we have not made a genuine vow to him.  We are not passionate enough about our faith to forsake all things for the sake of Christ, and so we continue to selfishly cling to the things that give us the greatest pleasure.  Letting go of our former selves is something that we simply do not wish to do, and we fail to give God 100%.  But God doesn’t want merely a percentage of our lives.  He wants all of us. 

What Men Want

All men have a bit of Neanderthal in them.  This doesn’t mean that we always behave like cavemen (sometimes we do), but we all possess a certain dominant and adventurous spirit of caretaking for our loved ones.  We still feel the resounding need to go into the wilderness to hunt and gather for our families.  In short, men are wired to be providers. 

What this necessitates in men is a burning desire to be respected by their partners.  Above all, men want to be respected and to know that their partner believes in them.  This is accomplished through audible messages.  While women often want to be shown affection (opening the car door, cuddling on the couch, flowers, etc.), men want to hear affection, i.e. “I believe in you,”  “I respect you,” “I love you,” and “I will never leave you.” 

Respect is man’s greatest need. When a woman gives a man support and respect, a man’s soul bursts with delight and he feels as if he can conquer the world.   Conversely, trouble begins to brew in relationships when a man doesn’t feel that he is being respected by the other party.  Ephesians 5:33 offers, "the wife must respect her husband."  Showing a man respect also builds trust, which is crucial component to any loving relationship.   

The “Outdated” Authority

In today’s world, our sources of information vary to extremes.  Conservative Republicans rely heavily on Fox News for information and commentary relating to political issues.  Democrats and progressives lean toward MSNBC, The Huffington Post, and other outlets to find answers.  Still others tune in to Oprah and Dr. Phil, pick up books by scientists, professors, theologians, and commentators, and rely on today’s horoscope to better understand their lives.  It seems almost natural to pursue these secular avenues to make sense of it all.  We take serious note of the newest scientific conclusions or societal changes in sexuality, political and economic theories, and morality and even rely on family and friends for life’s toughest challenges. 

However misguided or accurate many of these sources may be, we nod our heads in affirmation if these ideas and theories seem “right,” especially if they conform to our lifestyles, no matter how upright or hedonistic.  Dallas Willard’s The Divine Conspiracy bears down on the ill and far-reaching effects of distorted ideas and world views.  They often lead to anguish and deceit—even death.  Morality itself is being shaped by all-encompassing views, manifested in a world of opinions.  

Many purport to be or are considered “the” authority on a particular issue or set of issues.  If  we are looking for a good account of the Civil War, we might turn to the work of Shelby Foote.  If we want to know something about cooking, Emeril certainly would be a fantastic instructor.   I could go on and on with other examples. 

At best, scientists, professionals, and others who are commonly known as “authorities” have only a limited knowledge of a particular subject.  New discoveries are made every day, and what we thought we knew can often be merely the tip of the iceberg.  Who can deny that there is much, much more to know about the possibilities of medicine?  Have we exhausted the limits of technology, exploration, or psychology?  We have not even begun to breakthrough in these arenas. 

We have become so secularized and Americanized in our thinking that we tend to consider the teachings of Jesus as applied to our daily life to be somewhat obscure or outdated.  Sure, Jesus is not a great authority on preparing a great steak or building a website.  But very often we tend to place Christ in a corner as someone who is only concerned about spiritual and eternal issues, if we even consider him the authority at all. 

But Christ is vitally concerned about infiltrating into our very existence, into our work, relationships, and interaction with other human beings.   He is not only the authority on issues of Providence, he is the master teacher in the subject of life.  A quick glimpse of the malice and sufferings of man provides direct evidence that we are simply not good at living life.  The Bible should serve as our “How-to” book, or our “Life for Dummies.”  But it is more authoritative and compelling than that.  It explains why and for what and how much.  It is the place we derive meaning and daily sustenance.  It is our hope and our comfort when life simply doesn’t go the way we planned. 

After Jesus finished the Sermon on the Mount, the Bible says that the crowds were “amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.”  See Matthew 7:28.   When discussing the complexities of life, Jesus is the authority.  He does not purport to have all of the answers—he is the answer!  He is the authority. 

Ultimately, the truth of Jesus teachings remains constant while society and theory is ever-changing.  Colossians 2:8 offers, “See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than Christ.”  Which begs the question—“How does life turn out for us outside the truth of Christ?”